In recovery it is important to our wellbeing that we understand dissociation which at its heart is to understand the confidence tricks of a soporific society

Within our own recovery program it is important to our well-being that we understand what is dissociation which is at its heart is to understand the confidence tricks of a soporific society.

 We have become and are haunted by anxiety and stress of having to keep escaping our genuine feelings and of having to pretend to be happy all the time. we know this for ourselves because this is what we have become conditioned to have. 

We constantly don’t want to get into this too much.We learn to practice avoidant behaviours in collusion with our parents. And by escaping our innermost feelings, we create an inner void which is filled with either addictions or other people constantly manufacturing new dramas that we endlessly replicate.

We feel at the Ten Stages that we have found the explanation for why we are suffering so much. Especially the topics we address about this inner “void” we constantly construct, how morality keeps you away from you genuine “negative” feelings against your parents, how these feelings will express themselves in either violence or illness or addictions.

We have never experienced genuine emotional communication in our upbringing or our lives, so we can never believe that other people would ever be interested in our emotions and interior life. Which causes us a lot of feelings of abandonment , loneliness and guilt. But only after we have re-learned to trust our feelings and started to share them, do we discover at the stages that there are people who do communicate in this way. This is very new to us, because all our lives we have only experienced communication based on our “masks”, our “facade”, our “false self” and we could only relate to other grandiose, masked people, because we didn’t want to be abandoned by them. And we actually thought that this was really normal.

Our own parents are afflicted by;the deprivations of their bodies We as children of any age are forced to fill these deprivations of our parents, and in the process our child will have to sacrifice their own needs and feelings. And then the whole generational cycle starts all over again. 

We believe that the only way out of this, is to stop denying the feelings and emotions behind these feelings of emptiness and depression. And in the process to pay more attention to our child within the hidden self, to ourselves and our needs and strive to live in the fresh new world of the stages recovery studies.